成功婚姻的關鍵

1) Be friends first
1）首先要做朋友

Yes, of course, you’re no longer boyfriend and girlfriend – now you’re husband and wife. That’s a big deal and it’s a pretty massive change. There’s no way that you wouldn’t notice this.
是的，當然，你們已經不再是男女朋友關係——你們現在是夫妻關係。這是很重大的一件事，而且是一個非常巨大的改變。你肯定會注意到這一點。

But if you don’t act like the two of you are friends, you’re going to let all the ups and downs of life get in the way. Things won’t always be super great and you won’t be happy all the time. You’re going to have long, exhausting weeks at work. You’re going to have an epic cold that won’t go away for six weeks. You’re going to struggle to balance everything in your life, from your marriage to your best friends to your career and hobbies.
但是如果你在做事的時候不再像朋友一樣，那麼你的人生會出現起起落落。事情不會總是那麼順利，而且你也不會一直都很開心。你將會有冗長累人的工作周。而且你會經歷史無前例的感冒，6周都好不了。你會掙扎着平衡生活中的方方面面，從婚姻到最好的朋友，再到你的事業和愛好。

If you and your now husband stop being friends first, you might not be super compassionate toward each other when life doesn’t go as planned. And that would be a real shame since it would basically mean forgetting that whole “in sickness and in health” thing.
如果你和你的丈夫不再首先像朋友一樣相處，那麼當生活不按照計劃進行的時候，你們互相之間或許不會那麼富有同情心了。而且這將會是真正的羞辱，因爲這基本上意味着忘掉所有的“生病和健康”的事情。

2) Be your own person
2）做你自己

You can’t magically get rid of your life just because you’re married now. You need to still be your own person. If you don’t, you’re going to resent your husband for making your entire life about him… and that’s not fair since it will be your decision and your doing.
你不可能像魔法一樣來擺脫自己的生活，僅僅是因爲你現在結婚了。你還是需要做自己。如果你不再做自己，你將會怨恨你的丈夫，恨他將你的整個生活都變成了他的……而且這並不公平，因爲這是你自己的決定和做法。

Think about what matters to you the most in your life. That Saturday morning barre cardio class? Spending a quiet Sunday afternoon baking chocolate chip cookies? Girls night out and trips with your friends and seeing your parents and sister on a regular basis?
想想你生活中最重要的事情。週六的扶手槓有氧運動課程？在週日下午安靜地烤巧克力薄餅甜點？定期與閨蜜晚上一起閒逛，和你的朋友旅遊，看望你的父母和姐妹？

Don’t get rid of your interests and hobbies or stop seeing the people that mean the most to you. It’s unhealthy to be laser focused on your relationship, and your husband probably doesn’t want to give up everything and everyone that he loves, either.
不要放棄你的興趣愛好，不要停止看望對你重要的人。將所有的注意力都集中在你們關係上是不健康的，你的老公或許也不會像放棄他喜歡在乎的一切事和人。