簡單容易的英語短笑話
冷笑話是近幾年纔出現的新興語言現象,它以網絡爲主要的傳播方式。小編精心收集了簡單容易的英語短笑話,供大家欣賞學習!
簡單容易的英語短笑話篇1A construction worker was rushed to the hospital after cutting himself badly. The doctor told the nurse to prepare a painkiller. "Don’t bother Doctor," said the man. "I' ve been through a lot worse."
一個傷痕累累的建築工人衝進了一家醫院,醫生馬上讓護士去拿止痛藥,“不必麻煩您了,醫生。”那人說道,“比這更痛的傷我都經歷過了。”
"More painful than this?" the doctor asked.
“比現在的傷還要痛嗎?”醫生問。
"I’11 tell you about the second most painful accident I ever had. I was hunting one day and had to take a shit so I dropped my pants and squatted. I tripped a bear trap and BOOM,the thing snapped shut on my balls."
“我先說說讓我感到還不是最痛苦的那件事吧,一天我在打獵的時候突然想要大便,於是就脫掉褲子蹲在地上,不料被捕熊的夾子絆倒了,那東西夾住了我的皋丸。”
The doctor winced, "That’s awful. But tell me, what could be worse?"
醫生聽後顫抖了一下,說道“太可怕了,那告訴我什麼又是最痛苦的事呢?”
"When I reached the end of the chain."
“當我摸到鎖鏈盡端的時候。”
簡單容易的英語短笑話篇2A farmer purchases an old,run-down, abandoned farm with plans to turn it into a thriving enterprise. The fields are grown over with weeds,the farmhouse is falling apart,and the fences are collapsing all around.
一個農民買了一塊破舊荒廢的農場,他準備把這塊農場變成興旺的園林。然而目前這塊地是雜草叢生,房屋破舊不堪,四周的籬笆也是東倒西歪。
During his first day of work,the town preacher stops by to bless the man’s work,saying, "May you and God work together to make this the farm of your dreams!”
在他第一天工作的時候,城裏的一個傳教士給他送去了祝福:“願上帝與你一起實現你的夢想吧!”
A few months later, the preacher stops by again to call on the farmer. I}ok and behold,it’s like a completely different place-the farmhouse is completely rebuilt and in excellent condition,there are plenty of cattle and other livestock happily munching on feed in well-fenced pens,and the fields are filled with crops planted in neat rows.
幾個月以後,那個傳教士又一次來到農場,快看那,這裏與上次相比簡直是天壤之別。房屋重新修好了,條件也比以前好多了,成羣的牛羊在歡快地吃着青草,地裏的莊稼也整整齊齊的排列着。
"Amazing!” the preacher says. "Look what God and you have accomplished together!"
“太神奇了”,傳教士驚呼道:“看那,上帝和你一起實現了你的夢想!”
"Yes, reverend,” says the farmer, "but remember what the farm was like when God was working it alone!"
“沒錯,教士,”那個農民說道:“可你也要記住當初這個農場只由上帝一人支配的時候是個什麼樣子!”
簡單容易的英語短笑話篇3The dean of Engineering had once walked into a class, and said "Good Morning.”
一天工程系的主任走進一個班,說道:“早上好。”
The whole class chorused" Good Morning”
全班齊聲回覆:“早上好。”
"Hi,you are freshmen aren’t you?" he asked.
“你們是大一的吧?”主任問道。
One student bolder than the others asked him how he knew.
一個膽子比較大的同學問主任是怎麼知道的。
"Well,”he said. "When I say‘Good Morning' to a class,if they are freshmen they say Good Morning' too. If they are sophomores,they quietly fold their papers away,and look at me. A class of juniors will look at me over the top of their papers, and then get back to them. A class of seniors will ignore my greeting, and keep reading the papers. When I say `Good Morning' to a class of graduate students, they write it down.”
“嗯,”主任說,“如果是大一的新生,當我向他們問早上好的時候,他們也一定會說‘早上好’的。如果他們是大二的學生,他們會輕輕地合上課本,然後集體望着我。大三的學生則會從書本上擡起頭看我一眼,然後馬上又繼續讀書了。大四的學生則會對我視而不見,繼續看書。至於研究生班的學生,我向他們問早上好,他們就會把這句話寫在筆記上。”
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