地道英語笑話三則

笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆，在人們的日常生活中起着重要調劑作用。下面本站小編爲大家帶來地道英語笑話三則，歡迎大家閱讀!

"For the last time, I don't want any insurance ! " said the harassed householder to the sAlesman

“這是最後一次了，我不要買任何保險!”被騷擾的房主對推銷員說道。

"Just a moment, sir. Please consider this :Just last month I sold a policy to a man much like yourself.

“等一會兒，先生，請您仔細考慮一下：上個月有一位先生長得跟你很像，他剛買了一份保險，

The very next day his house caught fire. The house was completely gutted.

隔天他家就着火，房子內部全都被燒燬，

To save himself, he had to leap from an upstairs window; he landed on his own car, went through the roof, broke both his legs and an arm. ""Well, he was one of the lucky ones, wasn't he?"

爲了保住性命，他從樓上窗戶跳下來，恰巧落在他的汽車上，穿過車頂，他摔斷了兩條腿和一隻手臂。”

“喔!他就是你所說的幸運人士中的一個，不是嗎?”

A Jew, an Indian and a black were lined up to enter the Kingdom of Heaven.

一位猶太人、一位印第安人和一位黑人列隊進入天國之門。

Said the Jew to St. Peter, 66 Frankly, I'm rather surprised to be here. All my life Christians have despised and reviled me. "

那位猶太人對聖彼得說：“坦白講，能到這裏讓我蠻驚訝的，我一輩子一直都受到_的輕視和侮辱。”

"That's a great sorrow to us," said St. Peter, "but you won-t find that kind of prejudice here. Here, all are truly equal. Just spell God and you may enter. "

“我們實在感到非常遺憾，”聖彼得說，“但我們這裏沒有那樣的偏見，這裏每個人都完全平等，只要拼出G。d這個詞你就能進入天堂。”

Next,the Indian came forward and said,"r,all my life I suffered from poverty anddiscrimination,and could only live in a I truly be free here?"

那名猶太人正確地拼出 God後，被招入門內。 接着印第安人走向前說道“聖彼得，我一輩子飽受貧窮和種族歧視的打擊，而且只能住在居留地內，我在這裏能得到真正的自由嗎?”

"My son, your troubles are over. Just spell the word God you will be free as a bird. "

“小兄弟，你的煩惱已經結束了，只要拼出God這個詞，你就能像小鳥一樣自由自在。”

The Indian obliged and he, too, entered the Heavenly Kingdom.

印第安人照着做，不久也被引入天堂。

Next, the black man strode forward. "St. Peter," he said, "all my life people looked down on me and treated me unfairly. That won't happen here, will it?"

接着那名黑人跨步向前，“聖彼得，”他說道，“一輩子人們都瞧不起我，不公平對待我，在這裏那些事不會發生吧!”

"Of course not, my boy. We don't do that kind of thing here. Just spell" onomatopoeia "and the Kingdom of Heaven is yours "

“當然不會，我的弟兄，我們不會做那樣的事，只要拼出onomatopoeia這個詞，天堂之國就是你的了!”

A lawyer finds himself at the Pearly Gates at the same time as the pope.

一位律師發現他和某教宗一起到達天堂的珍珠門，

Both men are allowed to enter heaven,

兩個人都被允許進入天堂。

and the lawyer is ensconced in a magnificent mansion.

律師被安置在一間豪華的別墅，

But he sees that the pope is housed in a far more humble dwelling.

但他卻見到教宗被安排住在非常簡陋的住所。

Unable to restrain his curiosity,the lawyer asks r about it.

由於好奇心的驅使，律師問聖彼得其中原委。

“Well, you see,” replies St. Peter, "we have dozens of popes up here, but we-ve never had a lawyer before. "

“哦，你看我們這裏有好幾十位教宗，可是你卻是第一個上天堂的律師呢!”聖彼得答道。

以上就是本站小編爲大家帶來的地道英語笑話三則，希望大家喜歡!

地道英語笑話三則